February: A Month of Connections and Celebrations

After the training in January I went to Nebraska, catching up with business associates and friends, and absorbing important life lessons. February was all about strengthening connections and sometimes, unfortunately, breaking others. It was also my birthday month, which came with its own whirlwind of changes. In the Midwest, I reconnected with business associates and friends, immersing myself in meaningful conversations and networking opportunities. Strengthening these relationships was crucial for personal and professional growth. However, not all connections stood the test of time. Some were broken, a painful but necessary part of growth.

Ups & Downs

My birthday. It has always been a time of reflection. Some people wait for a new year to make resolutions and plans. For me, it was, and now again… is my birthday. It is not something I’ve been celebrating for some time now. Prior to being married, I used to lose myself in my husband and what I considered my marital role, and I stopped. The scary thing is that I didn’t even realize that I had stopped. Then, post-marriage, somehow it wasn’t important; my focus wasn’t me; it was rebuilding my finances and sanity. Frivolous things like “joy and celebration” weren’t on the priority list. The grind, however, was definitely on full blast. When that finally drifted away and I was doing self-work with not one but TWO counselors after the split, it was here that I found myself again. I found her and will not lose her again. I’ve been actively trying to improve on her daily, not always succeeding, but definitely always trying. I vowed never to dim my light again, and I started celebrating my birthday again as of 2022, complete with pictures. This year was no different. I knew I wanted to do something, but the issue was where. My plans underwent several changes. Keep following; it takes a lot of turns.

Initially, I planned to celebrate in New Orleans with my then-boyfriend (my first relationship after my husband). Then, I decided to stay with him in Nebraska. Things, however, Did. Not. Work. Out…. with us! We had a “swift” breakup. Breakups, deaths, losses, etc. happen at the weirdest times, it seems. You are never fully prepared, but somehow, weirdly, you are. You experience it, you hopefully learn from it, and you better pray to get some lessons from it. I definitely learned a lot from mine. As the old adage goes, if you don’t learn the lesson the first time, God or the universe (whoever you believe in) will keep bringing it back to you until you learn it. 

I learned some new things about the type of person that should be my partner, the type that shouldn’t, the character traits that are high on my hierarchy of needs, and the ones that aren’t. Without the experience of him (now ex), it may not have been possible. Sometimes you believe that since you’ve done the inner work, you are good, healed, and ready to take on the world, but it really isn’t until you let someone into your intimate spaces that you really realize where your weaknesses are. Then… then, you would have to decide for yourself what you want to do about the newfound weakness. Are you okay with being weak in that area, or do you want to strengthen it? Then look to your partner; can they complement that weakness or exploit it? Are you safe to be weak here, or is it frowned upon? 

Therapy is theory; now that you are back on active dating duty, you are now in the practical. Can you apply what you learned? 

I bet your sweet lil ass I was able to.

After “the split,” the beacon of friendship never shone as bright. My troops rallied to my side in unforeseen ways. A friend and his family showed me an unparalleled level of kindness. They ensured all of my needs were met. They fussed over me. They ensured I ate and was hydrated, that I was warm, that I had the foods I liked, and carried me to a house party and a game night. They made sure I was never alone and never sad. They treated me like one of their own. I felt as though I was almost fragile to them. Fragile was new to me. I’m always seen as this strong, independent woman. I’m never given the courtesy of fragility. So it did something to me, and I’ll be forever grateful for the level of care I received and to him.

Birthday 

While there, I decided to go to Virginia to see a friend I hadn’t seen for over a year. Her birthday is the day before mine. We spoke a lot after the spilt and it seemed to be the right choice because, come on, who better to celebrate my birthday with than my fellow Pisces? She picked me up from the airport, and we drove to what would be my home for almost a month. It was like a big ole slumber party. I’ve known her only a few years, but now we are thick as thieves. We bonded over her calling me out on my BS, and I loved her for it. You know how some people dance around a topic or have an issue with you but wouldn’t say anything to you, or they’ll tell everyone but you. She definitely was not that; she called me all the way out back then and has been doing it ever since. She closed on her home while I was there, and we got something else to celebrate. Unbeknownst to her, she has been a continuous source of inspiration for me. Her resilience and determination to break through life’s barriers left a lasting impression on me. She reminded me that no obstacle is too great if you have the will to overcome it.

So nowwwww my… well, our birthdays would be celebrated at a resort on Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. So it moved from New Orleans>Nebraska>Virginia>South Carolina. Those birthday plans kept changing, but guess what? The one constant was, that it was definitely happening. The constant impromptu changes were a reminder of life’s and my own unpredictability and the importance of flexibility.
The resort in Myrtle Beach was just what we both needed. 

We drove there from Virginia. Driving down….. Quick segway, what is up with those speed limits in SC? OMG? You are driving, and it’s 30; then 2 minutes later, it’s 45; and 5 minutes later, it’s 35. It played with me. Okay, back to the topic. We are two hours out. She starts checking out events, and she sees the one, the only, the legend, Gladys Knight, in concert. The performance starts, however, in two and a half hours. So we, of course, make the executive decision to attend. Thus begins our race against time. I skirted the speed limit, so we made good time. We rushed to a mall for shoes, and I could find something cute enough to match my dress (don’t judge me), so a quick pitstop became a task, aka a stressor, due to time. I finally got a pair of nude pumps. ran to the car and called the box office to get good seats while navigating (more stress), so I drove too far and had to turn back. We are late, so when we get to the venue, it’s way too late to go in and change. Sooooo, we did what any late Gladys Knight fans would do. We changed in the car in the parking lot. A very important point to note is that SC is cold this time of year. So two women were traveling for a week, and the car was obviously lacking space lol. So we had to do the changing betwixt the parking lot and the car. The experience was just everything. We managed to change into concert-worthy attire. We strutted into the Opry Theater as though we weren’t just fighting for our lives in that parking lot. We were seated, and it was worth it. She was completely awesome. It was truly a memorable experience.

The spontaneity of it all was exhilarating. It reminded me of how impulsive and fun I am when I allow myself to just be. This was a part of me I actually forgot existed. I missed that part.

Celebrating New Beginnings

As serendipity would have it, she was also recently separated. So we bonded over breakups, our personal wins, our mutual growth over the last few years and so much more.  Every morning, we woke up early to watch the sunrise behind the safety of the balcony doors because an oceanfront that time of year is quite frosty lol. These moments were filled with talks of gratitude. The peacefulness and the sense of new beginnings were wonderful. Everyday while we were there, a man would write on the beach in sand Jesus loves you. The mornings were special, peaceful and restorative.

We attended some live events, explored restaurants, slept away during our spa treatments and had an on compound treasure hunt.  
February was not just a month of celebrations; it was a month of learning. I absorbed valuable life lessons from each interaction and experience. Whether it was the importance of flexibility in plans or the resilience needed to break through barriers, each lesson was a stepping stone in my journey of personal and professional growth.

February was a whirlwind of connections, celebrations, and invaluable lessons. It taught me the importance of strengthening relationships, being flexible with plans, and drawing inspiration from those around me. This month reinforced the significance of resilience and adaptability in both personal and professional life.

1 thought on “February: A Month of Connections and Celebrations”

  1. I enjoyed every bit of it, like a true professional writer. ***few minor errors to correct but overall a very good read. 👏🏾

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